Fun & Fictional Reasons to “Join the Illuminati” (For Entertainment Only)

You finally get to understand all the memes about the All-Seeing Eye.

You’ll know every major world secret… except where your missing socks go.

Free robes. Probably comfortable. Maybe silk.

You get VIP access to meetings inside underground pyramids (or so the movies say).

You’ll never have to argue conspiracy theorists again — they’ll argue about you.

You get to use dramatic phrases like “It has begun” for no reason.

Every handshake becomes a mysterious coded greeting.

You can take credit for anything successful in the world.

If something goes wrong globally, people will also blame you — fame is fame.

Lifetime supply of triangle emojis ▲.

Everyone automatically assumes you're powerful, even if you're just eating noodles at home.

You always win arguments by whispering “That’s what they want you to think.”

You no longer need Google — you already “know everything.”

You get invited to secret meetings even when you're tired and want to stay home.

Your pet cat suddenly gains “spiritual significance.”

You become the main character in thousands of YouTube conspiracy videos.

People think your music playlist contains hidden messages.

Every time you cover one eye, someone thinks you’re signaling.

You become an automatic internet legend.

And most importantly: When life gets boring, you can always say… “It’s part of the master plan.